I drank the Koolaid. I did. I watched Oprah’s interview with Whitney Houston tonight, and I found myself genuinely believing Whitney. I believe she was addicted to drugs but was more consumed with trying desperately to do it on her own. I believe she was less crazy and more lost. I believe she got a little farther from the truth until it was easier to just to stay than work her way back to real Love. I believe her. I believe she forgot who she was. I believe she forgot where her strength comes from.
I also saw a startling comparison. Oprah and Whitney. They are so alike. Both black women who came from little to achieve incredible fortune and fame. Both at the top of their respective area of business. Both admired by many but known by few. But from there, they are so different. Oprah was lacking the authenticity that Whitney can’t cover up.
I listened to Whitney publicly admit her failures and give credit to God for pulling her through them. I watched her tear up when asked who she loved. Her first answer was God “because He never gave up on her.” You can fake a lot of things. You can’t fake peace. There is a passion that comes with living a life truly touched by God. And what we all fight so hard against is that you can’t really experience it until you need it. We ask why and run when the discomfort, pain and sorrow come, but they are necessary to know when they’ve been healed. You can’t be pulled from the pit until you’re in it.
I don’t think Whitney Houston is perfect. But I’m not either. I don’t think she’s gotten it all right. But neither do I. I do know that I sat down to veg out in front of the TV and God showed me 2 options. I can be Whitney, or I can be Oprah.
I can live a life – screw-ups and all – that brings glory to God. I can trust Him even when I can’t see where He’s taking me. Or I can smile and say all the right things but never really know what it feels like to love Him passionately…and be loved by Him.
If those are my choices, I wanna be like Whitney.